Still Queezy: Reasons Why You Should Not Eat and Watch "The Human Centipede"

My first quiestion is: What kind of sick person thought up this nasty idea? Sure, it makes for a great horror movie, probably one of the most disturbing ideas I have heard in the past at least 10 years. But, what kind of person was sitting somewhere, at some time, doing god knows what, thinking,"What is the mathematical equation for ass to mouth times 3 people plus a mad scientist? What would that be like? Could I make this into a movie?"

If you happen to be reading this because maybe you have heard of this Memorable Mutilations award winning movie and you don't want to take the risk of throwing up in your mouth or being so affected by this movie that you can never get your normal life back, don't worry: you won't. In fact, right now, if you know this movie is about a crazed German(fucking Germans) surgeon deciding he wants to surgically attach three poeple together yet create a fluid single digestive tract that flows through each person to the next, you are probably thinking of much worse images than are displayed in this film. You do see the "centipede" in all its glory, a young woman being #3(her mouth attached to #2 butthole, mouth gaping open as to digest the..um...you get the idea), her bestee female being #2(butt attached to #3, but her mouth is also attached to #1 butthole), and a Japanese man being #1(figures it would be a man's ass attached to a girl's mouth, he doesn't even have to go through the most horrible part, his mouth is not attached to anything). But when you see the centipede writhing around, young man in front screaming in Japanese and cursing, you never really have to see the, shall we say "fluids" going from one person to next.

Instead, this movie counts on the great and natural acting on the part of the players that make up the centipede. Thier disgust and horror during these critical moments allow the audience to fill in the blanks, making for a possibly more grisly movie than if the gore was completely out there since relies on each individual audience members own imagination. It does go without saying there are a few moments when one might be prone to vomit in their popcorn, but more than likely the faint of heart and queezy wouldn't be watching this anyways. I was more disgusted by the premise than the actual movie itself. I really didn't think it was so repulsive afterwards. I guess watching it allows viewer to realize it is incredibly goofy and pretty much impossible.

Stay strong readers, seek out this movie and watch. If you can handle a little bit of the absurdly disturbing, you should be able to handle "The Human Centipede". Besides, if there is a need for water cooler conversation, this is probably going to be the conversation starter of the fucking year.